Tuesday, January 29, 2008

You Know Where I'd Take The Cake??

Ok seriously George Carlin is a GENIOUS!!!!!
He is amazing. His stand-up is pretty much me. If you get George Carlin's stand-up and like it you kind of rock. So I’m going to be all lame and shit be all oh my god this quote like totally defines me, but for real this really does describe me........are you ready for it? Get ready bitches.......here it comes "I don't have Pet Peeves; I have major psychotic fucking hatreds"!!!!!! If you know me you know this is true!!!! I don't just get a little but angry about things I fucking hate them in a huge way!!! I can't even explain why, things just get on my nerves and then i want to kick some fucking head in. Doesn't take much either.....you should maybe watch it, I'm just saying is all. So this is my new bog. Think about it, sit on it, try it out for size, see how you fucking like it asshole. So I’m going to leave you with a few George Carlin quotes because really I’m incompetent and I don't know how to post a video so here goes!!!

"My god has a bigger dick then your god"
"You know where I’d take the cake? To the bakery to see the other cakes"
"you smell like an anchovies cunt"
" Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!"
"So I say, “Live and let live.” That’s my motto. “Live and let live.” Anyone who can’t go along with that, take him outside and shoot the motherfucker. It’s a simple philosophy, but it’s always worked in our family."
“When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?” This title offends all three major religions, and even vegetarians!"
"And now, in the interest of equal time, here is a message from the National Institute of Pancakes: It reads, and I quote, “Fuck waffles."
"I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it."

Seriously you can't argue with this shit!!!!


Lilly said...
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Christine said...

update! seriously, this should be like, a daily thing...DOOOO IT